Asking such a question will presuppose many opinions. It is my intention to argue this question in the affirmative.....based on the second level of growth...puberty....through which we must adapt to a physical stage wherein we humans can...and will....reproduce. In the study of eastern mysticism, belief, faith etc......I also relate to the magnetic containment of memoried experience, therein known as "chakras", which allow humans to repeat all act......such as eating and sleeping. I think , as I have expressed in former posts, the Mystics of earlier times envisioned the growth stages of life in the defining of the 7 main "chakras". To me, at least, the parallels from their visionary practices perfectly coincide with much that subsequent "science" has discovered.
The second "chakra" governs all sexual experience in its most understandable fashion...simply because it relates to reproduction.....or sexuality. Through the idea in anthropocentric based beliefs.... our self-defining characteristics........ we willfully "go forth to be fruitful by multiplying"....even though the supposed Yahweh-based instruction to Abraham is undoubtably leading our species to the brink of annihilation by its far too literal interpretation and expression.
So...what is that "puberty chakra" REALLY about ? Could it be that we humans were intended to physically recreate only to the extent that our uncontrollable urge to survive becomes monumentally suspect ?
Perhaps, as many other literalist interpretations of mid-eastern belief ( which includes both Koran and the Bible) come into educated scrutiny, so too must the incessant desire, by many, to see themselves as God's "pawn image" incarnate on earth. Instead.... through overpopulation by our species, we should realize we are all part of a greater spectrum of life that needs....not to be physically perpetuated.....but just simply accepted as a gift of "creationary force"....a temporary existence in an infinite "garden". Maybe.....we're not supposed to endlessly attempt to perpetuate our species at all. Maybe......we are merely meant to utilize our procreative ability as a circular learning curve in a "game" of self-recognition. It could be argued that such a concept is the purest form of anthropocentricity.
It seems to me the formation of the many 'mystery schools' some two to five thousand years ago, offered such insight into this 'game of tail-chasing' we call life. Since that time the re-union of the rift between science and religiosity may merely be the 'long-way around' to arrive at the same conclusion the 'mystery schools' offered. So mankind, by and large, chose to ignore the earlier offering of true intuitive knowledge and instead , through ignorance and fear, physically expresses the second chakra trying to insulate ourselves from death by overpopulation. It is the fear of death which bases the consensus that necessitates society, for through society mankind finds support for all his physical endeavors. Love you say ??? Bullshit !!! 99% of ideas of love are merely formed from a need for community due to the fear of lack....death.
The interesting aspect of all this could be argued in relation to a "re-evolutionary" principle. If random chaos theories held any real weight.....reason would never exist at any level. So if we miss the first overall "offering for universal knowledge".......we will still come to it by a seemingly chaotic "weigh", pardon the "metaphun". Its as if, simply put, those of us too afraid to delve into the image of self...as 'God'.....will relive our own 'creative sorrow' through creating physical likenesses of ourselves again and again......till we've used up the frame work of physical dimension......in this case an ecological imbalance.
Blessings to all.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
"learning to accept Death is learning to embrace life"
I take the time to write this for some of you may have missed something recently..... you were actually meant to learn from. Its just something different to consider and I wouldn't bother but for the fact a number of you are healers.....plus spirit suggested this to me.
The greatest of obstacles a healer must face is the inherent, ingrained fear.....of death. We speculate, we argue, we attest, but.....mostly......we fear it. Our cultural roots drill us from before the time we are born with religious imagery about death and all its implied loss........primarily our own......but far more inclusive through implications and supplication. The structure of our DNA also provides us with an even stronger measure against death. Its chemistry creates the pattern which makes us reach for survival to a much greater degree than many may be aware of.
As a channel I have told personal stories of my own regarding conversations with the spirit of someone who had passed. None of these were made up or copied. It would seem then that I am able to accept death to an easier degree than many others. This may be the case, for I've experienced a powerful classic near-death situation and many close calls in my time, but I can't be sure since I'm not dead. I've dealt with many who have lost loved ones during the course of my life and some of these interactions were.....simply put....astounding.....leaving the bereaved, as well as myself, impressed beyond simple doubt that something "guarantees" our spirit lives on. So I want to say that the fear is created by the inability to control death. The stronger our fear of living is....the stronger our fear of death and dead things will be.
I find references to death often support its social dogma even among healers. Television shows concerning the supernatural ( a rather ridiculous oxymoron) abound in popularity. Pandering to the issue is rife in all western style thinking. So I thought I'd tell a few stories of my own regarding death and how I've come to being a bit more accepting of all its attachments.
Many years ago, as a surfer, I watched a man drown off the end of a jetty in Galveston, Texas. There was no way to reach him safely since the surf was unusually big and trying would have likely placed myself and my friend in the same space. It was not pleasant and within fifteen minutes the beach patrol was fishing for his body with long poles. Obviously, I've never forgotten this. One of my high-school icons, a fellow older than I, died standing up in his kitchen from an overdose of heroin. His father found him leaning against the counter stone-dead when he arose for work in the morning. A neighbor of mine, years ago in Vancouver, died in her apartment and nobody knew until she began decomposing. The smell is unforgettable. Ten years ago a distraught neighbor of mine hung himself over his separation. He hung for three days during Halloween in a shed behind the fence between our yards. My dog Jake howled every night but I could not figure out why because I was too preoccupied with my own life. Charley had approached me about depression a couple of weeks before this and I'd invited him to come and talk but he never did. I could go on and on recounting the losses of friends and neighbors.
I've lived in Prince George for almost thirty years and know many of its people. In small towns death becomes a community issue because everyone is easily connected. Some of the funerals are huge and one begins to realize the scope of connectedness through attendance because there are people who come just because it was a member of their community. The support for the bereaved can be enormous.
As I stated above there are many instances where I've found myself going beyond the normal support into paranormal support. I don't care what you think regarding how this works or why because all reason gets suspended at this point. It is from this position I exercise the lesson I intended.
In 1974, while living and working on a ranch owned by a local pioneer family, Suzanne spent a portion of summer working to find and retrieve 6 bodies of classmates from a local high school. These local teens had decided to canoe the Willow River from the Highway 16 East bridge to the community of Willow River, not knowing anything about the impassable, treacherous canyon below the bridge area. It is remarkable that none of the parents of these young men were aware of the danger, considering the area involved, with all the outdoor lifestyles. It would seem plausible that someone would have heard of their plan and thought to warn but that never happened. The result was a tradgedy which affected the entire community of Prince George. The funeral was massive with a memoriam in their High School Auditorium. The young men would have realized their mistake within moments of departure from the park below the bridge but, even without the high spring level of the river, their fate was sealed. Recovery of the bodies was impossible though searchers combed the river for weeks after. The canyon itself was completely off limits to the searchers because of its steep walls, rocks, and channel. It was the foreman of the ranch where Suzanne was living and working who located the first two bodies but this happened a month for one.....and a few weeks later for the second, as the river level dropped with a lessening of spring runoff. Four months later in late August Suzanne and Miles Perry, her boss, began smelling the others while haying in the back fields along the river. This initiated searching for them and retrieving bones and pieces of clothing etc. until all but one lad had been found. They never found the last one and his brother kept searching and helping out long after the main search was suspended. Suzanne told me the impact of this on her personally was a staggering eye-opener to death. Her words were, "there is nothing as awful as packing dead bodies, in pieces, out of the bush in backpacks". The marks of bears feeding on them were on a number of the bones and skulls. She was fortunate to have this old pioneer clan to help her handle herself throughout the journey. She knew every single young man, personally, but the boy from the Queen Charlottes. Suz has kept a pictorial record from this event for all these years. I would bet my life there will be hearty thanks passed on to her from their spirits when she greets them on the other side. She is a very special woman with the heart of a lion, balls of steel, and the ability to teach an army how to understand love.
So..............think about it from my perspective. There are those of us who inadvertently 'stumble' across bodies or scenes of death and never recognize what is happening because we've too many blocking mechanisms in place which avoid the issue every way we can. It is such mechanisms which hold KEYS to our enjoying richer and fuller lives. I read about one such incident in blog world recently and would advise this person to 'look again' at the incident and ask herself whether the 'protection' she thought was given.......may have actually been an offer from the so identified "angels" for her to learn something positive........from finding something so traumatizing to her. Maybe.....just maybe....this was an incident she was guided into to help her with other incidents of loss.....both past and future...........which are forthcoming in her life.......a way of becoming truly familiar with the reality that true healing is found in our abilities to articulate death for others in a properly supported manner.....than a manner full of classical distortions.
Relations...and relationships never die.....but they do suspend in time....and will be addressed at some other time and space for certain.
Bless us all my Grandothers.......dead and alive.
The greatest of obstacles a healer must face is the inherent, ingrained fear.....of death. We speculate, we argue, we attest, but.....mostly......we fear it. Our cultural roots drill us from before the time we are born with religious imagery about death and all its implied loss........primarily our own......but far more inclusive through implications and supplication. The structure of our DNA also provides us with an even stronger measure against death. Its chemistry creates the pattern which makes us reach for survival to a much greater degree than many may be aware of.
As a channel I have told personal stories of my own regarding conversations with the spirit of someone who had passed. None of these were made up or copied. It would seem then that I am able to accept death to an easier degree than many others. This may be the case, for I've experienced a powerful classic near-death situation and many close calls in my time, but I can't be sure since I'm not dead. I've dealt with many who have lost loved ones during the course of my life and some of these interactions were.....simply put....astounding.....leaving the bereaved, as well as myself, impressed beyond simple doubt that something "guarantees" our spirit lives on. So I want to say that the fear is created by the inability to control death. The stronger our fear of living is....the stronger our fear of death and dead things will be.
I find references to death often support its social dogma even among healers. Television shows concerning the supernatural ( a rather ridiculous oxymoron) abound in popularity. Pandering to the issue is rife in all western style thinking. So I thought I'd tell a few stories of my own regarding death and how I've come to being a bit more accepting of all its attachments.
Many years ago, as a surfer, I watched a man drown off the end of a jetty in Galveston, Texas. There was no way to reach him safely since the surf was unusually big and trying would have likely placed myself and my friend in the same space. It was not pleasant and within fifteen minutes the beach patrol was fishing for his body with long poles. Obviously, I've never forgotten this. One of my high-school icons, a fellow older than I, died standing up in his kitchen from an overdose of heroin. His father found him leaning against the counter stone-dead when he arose for work in the morning. A neighbor of mine, years ago in Vancouver, died in her apartment and nobody knew until she began decomposing. The smell is unforgettable. Ten years ago a distraught neighbor of mine hung himself over his separation. He hung for three days during Halloween in a shed behind the fence between our yards. My dog Jake howled every night but I could not figure out why because I was too preoccupied with my own life. Charley had approached me about depression a couple of weeks before this and I'd invited him to come and talk but he never did. I could go on and on recounting the losses of friends and neighbors.
I've lived in Prince George for almost thirty years and know many of its people. In small towns death becomes a community issue because everyone is easily connected. Some of the funerals are huge and one begins to realize the scope of connectedness through attendance because there are people who come just because it was a member of their community. The support for the bereaved can be enormous.
As I stated above there are many instances where I've found myself going beyond the normal support into paranormal support. I don't care what you think regarding how this works or why because all reason gets suspended at this point. It is from this position I exercise the lesson I intended.
In 1974, while living and working on a ranch owned by a local pioneer family, Suzanne spent a portion of summer working to find and retrieve 6 bodies of classmates from a local high school. These local teens had decided to canoe the Willow River from the Highway 16 East bridge to the community of Willow River, not knowing anything about the impassable, treacherous canyon below the bridge area. It is remarkable that none of the parents of these young men were aware of the danger, considering the area involved, with all the outdoor lifestyles. It would seem plausible that someone would have heard of their plan and thought to warn but that never happened. The result was a tradgedy which affected the entire community of Prince George. The funeral was massive with a memoriam in their High School Auditorium. The young men would have realized their mistake within moments of departure from the park below the bridge but, even without the high spring level of the river, their fate was sealed. Recovery of the bodies was impossible though searchers combed the river for weeks after. The canyon itself was completely off limits to the searchers because of its steep walls, rocks, and channel. It was the foreman of the ranch where Suzanne was living and working who located the first two bodies but this happened a month for one.....and a few weeks later for the second, as the river level dropped with a lessening of spring runoff. Four months later in late August Suzanne and Miles Perry, her boss, began smelling the others while haying in the back fields along the river. This initiated searching for them and retrieving bones and pieces of clothing etc. until all but one lad had been found. They never found the last one and his brother kept searching and helping out long after the main search was suspended. Suzanne told me the impact of this on her personally was a staggering eye-opener to death. Her words were, "there is nothing as awful as packing dead bodies, in pieces, out of the bush in backpacks". The marks of bears feeding on them were on a number of the bones and skulls. She was fortunate to have this old pioneer clan to help her handle herself throughout the journey. She knew every single young man, personally, but the boy from the Queen Charlottes. Suz has kept a pictorial record from this event for all these years. I would bet my life there will be hearty thanks passed on to her from their spirits when she greets them on the other side. She is a very special woman with the heart of a lion, balls of steel, and the ability to teach an army how to understand love.
So..............think about it from my perspective. There are those of us who inadvertently 'stumble' across bodies or scenes of death and never recognize what is happening because we've too many blocking mechanisms in place which avoid the issue every way we can. It is such mechanisms which hold KEYS to our enjoying richer and fuller lives. I read about one such incident in blog world recently and would advise this person to 'look again' at the incident and ask herself whether the 'protection' she thought was given.......may have actually been an offer from the so identified "angels" for her to learn something positive........from finding something so traumatizing to her. Maybe.....just maybe....this was an incident she was guided into to help her with other incidents of loss.....both past and future...........which are forthcoming in her life.......a way of becoming truly familiar with the reality that true healing is found in our abilities to articulate death for others in a properly supported manner.....than a manner full of classical distortions.
Relations...and relationships never die.....but they do suspend in time....and will be addressed at some other time and space for certain.
Bless us all my Grandothers.......dead and alive.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
"the Quest"
through the twists and turns I meet while on this road.
then I'll need to find the freedom through the hour's glass...
to pursue its weight and dump the overload.
Through a curtain of consensus by agreement in......
and resulting chaos suffered all along.
I began a stripping off of all the paint I'd used.....
and I found my sourced opinions based all wrong.
So I've tackled every obstacle that life has thrown....
with a zeal, a zest, a passion rarely seen.
And while some have tried to block the way I seek....
others have purported what could be.
So I'll keep the course I've chosen for this spate of time....
I'll not falter in the shadows of this quest.
For I've found there is no reward at some pearly gate
all the answers lie among the endlessness
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Trials and Tribulations........
I've often wondered what I'd find among the scattered memories of forgotten emotion.....times I'd lived watching, estimating value, and initiating action from below the realm of adolescence.....and still further......from adulthood.....the time when the view was from a "leg" perspective. The few images memory held prevalent and made available when prompted by some emotional stimulus seemed to point toward the existence of some sort of 'special child'......at least that is what I was led to believe with statements made by my mother during the years. I personally could never associate any special feelings to her musing or to pictures I have from the early years. There were vague references to some sort of gregarious nature of fearlessness and curiosity......which were sprinkled......at times.....with words like selfish and statements regarding reminders of my father who was the classic "distant" parent. I heard a lot of condemning phrases such as "acting just like him" and "reminds me of". These probably encouraged me to focus forward rather than enjoy and absorb the present circumstances on a daily basis. I remember always wanting to be somewhere other than where I was. In the last forty years I exposed this as a 'self-evident truth' which began in my mother's lack of happiness and convoluted denials.
In the course of writing this blog I've mentioned instances of epiphany whereby I discovered many layers of my own resistance to life and attempted to offer the understandings of cultural inundation I've gleaned from this. This year is opening with an even greater potential for myself and some who stand very close to me to bring "lost fragments" of self back into view. I have been experiencing a rebirth of imagination through a relationship which is dawning between myself, Suzanne, and another. It is an unusual triad with a lack of social dogma such as jealousy....and the nuances it is configuring itself with are offering some very empowering attitude changes . For one thing........just prior to Christmas.......Suzanne found herself undergoing a purposeful awakening in a way which can be described only through a metaphor such as the blossoming of a lotus flower. Its like her ability to love turned a corner deep inside and is initiating something long held in check from early childhood. She was astounded.
I am experiencing the self-same. Long constricted feelings began surfacing in the month of September and a chain of epiphany reached a recognizeable level which has done nothing less than astound me.
The muse in all of this is our eight year friendship with a woman, her children, and her life.....interacting with our own..........which has been opening these doors of early childhood for each of us. She too.....has had an amazing epiphany about her self-worth in this relationship and a multitude of smaller ones which are starting to offer her substantial insights into her past, present and potentials for future. In finding ourselves as a support system in multiple ways as she changes her survival mode.....we are finding her the support or muse if you like....which 'cements' expanded ideas of love as 'energy extant' without the need classically associated to this idea........and all three of us are experiencing a rebirth.
There was a time in my life when I began to sense a bitterness creeping into my 'heart' as I thought I was failing in my quest for self-realization. This was in and around my early 30s. I had an opportunity to change my relationship at the time but I chose to 're-set' my goal by setting my personal desire aside in favor of a bigger picture. I did not realize that the following 10 years would teach me so much about habitual self-abuse.....universally and personally. Those years changed a point of spiritual focus from a point of searching for an 'external answer'........to the reality that the answers lay in the 'trackable' psychology of my past.......my 'inside'. It could be said that halfway through my 4th level of growth...in 7 year cycles......a door had opened which began an ardent re-working of my first 3.5 cycles. This 'door' kept initiating a second look....each time stagnation threatened to create a perfect parallel of my dogmatic past attitudes. In my early 30s I was struggling with my 2nd marriage, trying to hold it together while my wife was doing her best to destroy it. Things were a mess. There was a longing inside to just let go of her and try to move forward but the words of an elder from my past kept 'ringing' in my ears that I must earn my way past my past......by comprehension.....or I would merely recreate the lesson again and again. I think.......in hindsight.......had I walked away at that point and taken the other road I'd have learned what I was reaching for but how can we know for certain. My adopted attitude from the near death experience at 25 was to become tenacious in my quest and refuse to give up until all 'avenues' were exhausted. It is that tenacity, inherited from my mother, which has kept the 'fire inside' burning brightly all these years in my search for self and the recalcitrant attitude I approach social dogma with.
Now....here is a couple of parallels for perusal. Suzanne went through a perfect contextual parallel in her early 30s. The threat of bitterness increased slowly over the next 10 years and only her meditations kept it at bay. Our friend is facing up to every aspect Suz and I went through,as I write, and knows it. The entrenched attitudes of her former partner are extremely similar to those of my father around the time my younger sister was about a year old . It was in the next two years that I believe my mother fought with herself and my father over the issue of his irresponsible selfishness.......and
finally gave up......slowly becoming the emotionally hardened self-righteous woman who raised us. During that period is when she talked about me changing from this wonder-filled loving child to this wild-seed hellion that I was. I have long looked for verification of these 'facts' but could not clarify them through my mother. As well.....many is the time in the last ten years I have made statements to Suzanne regarding a pet peeve to have met her when she was in her early 30s and the subsequent discussions of things having possibly gone a very different way. It is a tough 'row to hoe' when only one partner wants to dance the dance of life.......and the other is merely content to live vicariously.
This love of these many women past and current are the 'river' which lead me to awareness of what "love" really is by opening up my mind to memories I buried in layers...as we all do when learning to survive through our trials and tribulations.
In the course of writing this blog I've mentioned instances of epiphany whereby I discovered many layers of my own resistance to life and attempted to offer the understandings of cultural inundation I've gleaned from this. This year is opening with an even greater potential for myself and some who stand very close to me to bring "lost fragments" of self back into view. I have been experiencing a rebirth of imagination through a relationship which is dawning between myself, Suzanne, and another. It is an unusual triad with a lack of social dogma such as jealousy....and the nuances it is configuring itself with are offering some very empowering attitude changes . For one thing........just prior to Christmas.......Suzanne found herself undergoing a purposeful awakening in a way which can be described only through a metaphor such as the blossoming of a lotus flower. Its like her ability to love turned a corner deep inside and is initiating something long held in check from early childhood. She was astounded.
I am experiencing the self-same. Long constricted feelings began surfacing in the month of September and a chain of epiphany reached a recognizeable level which has done nothing less than astound me.
The muse in all of this is our eight year friendship with a woman, her children, and her life.....interacting with our own..........which has been opening these doors of early childhood for each of us. She too.....has had an amazing epiphany about her self-worth in this relationship and a multitude of smaller ones which are starting to offer her substantial insights into her past, present and potentials for future. In finding ourselves as a support system in multiple ways as she changes her survival mode.....we are finding her the support or muse if you like....which 'cements' expanded ideas of love as 'energy extant' without the need classically associated to this idea........and all three of us are experiencing a rebirth.
There was a time in my life when I began to sense a bitterness creeping into my 'heart' as I thought I was failing in my quest for self-realization. This was in and around my early 30s. I had an opportunity to change my relationship at the time but I chose to 're-set' my goal by setting my personal desire aside in favor of a bigger picture. I did not realize that the following 10 years would teach me so much about habitual self-abuse.....universally and personally. Those years changed a point of spiritual focus from a point of searching for an 'external answer'........to the reality that the answers lay in the 'trackable' psychology of my past.......my 'inside'. It could be said that halfway through my 4th level of growth...in 7 year cycles......a door had opened which began an ardent re-working of my first 3.5 cycles. This 'door' kept initiating a second look....each time stagnation threatened to create a perfect parallel of my dogmatic past attitudes. In my early 30s I was struggling with my 2nd marriage, trying to hold it together while my wife was doing her best to destroy it. Things were a mess. There was a longing inside to just let go of her and try to move forward but the words of an elder from my past kept 'ringing' in my ears that I must earn my way past my past......by comprehension.....or I would merely recreate the lesson again and again. I think.......in hindsight.......had I walked away at that point and taken the other road I'd have learned what I was reaching for but how can we know for certain. My adopted attitude from the near death experience at 25 was to become tenacious in my quest and refuse to give up until all 'avenues' were exhausted. It is that tenacity, inherited from my mother, which has kept the 'fire inside' burning brightly all these years in my search for self and the recalcitrant attitude I approach social dogma with.
finally gave up......slowly becoming the emotionally hardened self-righteous woman who raised us. During that period is when she talked about me changing from this wonder-filled loving child to this wild-seed hellion that I was. I have long looked for verification of these 'facts' but could not clarify them through my mother. As well.....many is the time in the last ten years I have made statements to Suzanne regarding a pet peeve to have met her when she was in her early 30s and the subsequent discussions of things having possibly gone a very different way. It is a tough 'row to hoe' when only one partner wants to dance the dance of life.......and the other is merely content to live vicariously.
This love of these many women past and current are the 'river' which lead me to awareness of what "love" really is by opening up my mind to memories I buried in layers...as we all do when learning to survive through our trials and tribulations.
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